I really don't know why I dread it

[janradder]

Every time I set aside time to write, I get this feeling of dread and despair. I almost feel sick about it, especially when I'm doing revisions. I think about the writing in front of me like it's going to be some horribly painful activity and there's no way I'll ever be able get it done. But then I go ahead and get started and sometimes it goes really well and the writing is easy and sometimes I struggle with it. But at the end, I always feel the same -- pumped up and excited. I just don't know why I can't remember that feeling later on, when I'm trying to motivate myself again.